Thursday, October 9, 2008

Flipper's Mafia

EDGEWATER, Fla. - A woman is recovering in Florida after a dolphin hit her when it leaped aboard the boat she was in (see what you get boys and girls for not buying dolphin safe tuna?).

The Coast Guard says witnesses called 911 Thursday after seeing the dolphin jump from the Intracoastal Waterway and hit Barbara Howard of Mansfield, Ohio (why is it that I picture this dolphin wearing a black mask and making ninja-like sounds? What a great movie idea for M. Night Shamalamadingdong!! “ Ninja Dolphins of the Damned!”)

Howard was sitting in an 18-foot boat with her husband, their daughter and their daughter's boyfriend.

The Howards say the dolphin jumped about six feet high (oooooo….Olympic Ninja Dolphins of the Damned!) and landed on the bow (holy shit! It did a pile driver!).

They say it slid in their laps and its thrashing tail knocked them to the deck. Their daughter's boyfriend rolled the dolphin back into the water (soooo...her boyfriend is good with rolling large, slippery things into water. Interesting.).

The husband and wife were treated at a hospital for cuts and bruises and released (Wait. Cuts? Was this a latino dolphin?)


Kristin said...

Ok. So, one night I could not sleep and got up to work on my blog. My Mom had mentioned Bobby Dean earlier that day, who I think is a cutie. My Mom said, "Do you think he likes girlies?". I said of course he likes girls....I think.... So, I looked it up and came across your blog. You are hilarious! I have called my friends and family and have read many of your excerpts to lift there day and truly to give me one more time to say, "What in Sam Hill and...." for them to laugh out loud. Through all of this I have giggled until my sides hurt and now in GA you have many new blog followers. You are Sandra Bullock and my sister Wendy all spun into one wonderful and uplifting blog! Thank you and I hope it is okay that we visit every now and again for a big smile!

Rosie said...

"What in Sam Hill?" Tata would be proud that his saying is on the internet.

Natalie said...

I think it would have been more interesting if the dolphin jumped into the boat to escape a Great White shark that was after it. And then the shark started gnawing on the boat and ramming it, so the boyfriend rolled the dolphin into the water to save their own lives and they sped away to the sound of dolphin shrieks. That’s the National Geographic version. LOL.

Kelly said...

mom you are so messed up!But this is funny.I think its ur comminatry that makes it even funnyer.Well at least i have a mom with a good sence of sick and twisted humor right?lol