Paula Deen Groupies

Apparently there are some Paula Deen groupies in Scottsdale. I never thought I would ever see/meet someone that loves butter as much as Paula does. OH, how wrong I was.

I was driving home the other night and noticed that the SUV in front of me had a personalized license plate. This is not something uncommon in Scottsdale. Since moving here four years ago, I have seen more personalized plates than should be allowed. Seriously, it's completely out of control. But, whatever. Apparetnly, Scottsdale needs the money. How else do you explain all the photo radar cameras?

Anyway...I didn't have my camera with me and had to take the picture with my phone. And it sucked. So, I'll just tell you...the license plate read, "BUTTRR".

Cute, right? I bet these people TiVO each episode of Paula's show and try to work in "Y'all" or "Best Dishes" into their daily vernacular.

I thought this was the end of seeing some funky butter lovin'. But, no. I was wrong...AGAIN!

Two days later I was behind yet another SUV. This time the license plate read, "BTRNUT" (butter nut).

Then I got to wondering....

Do Paula Deen groupies each have their own nickname? (ButterNut, Butter Ball, etc.)

Is there a secret handshake?

Is Scottsdale, Arizona thier headquarters?

Do they worship the Land O Lakes?

I'd be kind of afraid if I had groupies. They'd most likely be all hopped up on goofballs or something.

Rachael Ray Book Signing at Kierland

I gave my daughter one of her Christmas presents early. A friend of mine told me that Rachael Ray would be at Kierland for a book signing in December. Yippee!

A few years ago, my daughter went through the RR cookbook I have and picked out what she wanted me to make for her birthday dinner. I've made it for her birthday every year since.

I picked her up from school yesterday and we headed over to Kierland. We stood in line for three hours before the book signing was even scheudled to start. Thank God ~ the line had already started to form.

My friend Nicole showed up, made a Starbucks run and waited in line with us.

When my daughter gave Rachael her book she said, "You're my biggest inspiration for cooking. I made my first meal when I was 7."

Rachael told my daughter that she had her beat by four years, she had made her first meal at 11.

Then my daughter told Rachael that she was 14 and Rachael Ray nearly had a fit. She thought my "baby" looked 18. That coupled with the fact that she just met Miss Rachael made my daughters day.

I so have the Mommy of the Year award wrapped up!

* side note: I met a lady in line who didn't have a ticket. oops! However, the store told me that I could bring as many people as I wanted on my one ticket. This sounded fishy, so I asked about it. Twice. And got the same answer both times. So, anyway, I let this lady come in with us. It is, after all, Christmastime, the Season of Perpetual Hope. Turns out she works for McCormick spices. Guess who will be getting some free spices....YAY ME!

Rachael Ray signing my books.

Rachael Ray signing my daughters book.

Thanks, Rachael. You were so gracious and sweet to my daughter. I wish you success in all your future endeavors and hope you have a lovely holiday!

Please Hammer Don't Hurt Them!

I've discovered an epidemic in the sleepy western town of Scottsdale, Arizona. A rogue band of criminals has chosen to inhabit this once peaceful town.

Their crime you ask?

To deface government property with a "hammertime" template. (Y'all know where I'm going with this...)

At first, I thought the hammertime stop sign I saw was a one time event. You know, something someone did as a prank. It wasn't in a conspicuous place and you had to really be paying attention. I didn't know how wrong I was.

10 miles to the west was another stop sign. Next to a park that is always full of kids and families. This stop sign had "hammertime" spray painted underneath the word "stop". In blue paint this time intead of white.

Well played, rogue band. Well played. Oh, and thanks for the laughs!

How to Spot a Ho-fessional in Scottsdale

Patti made a command decision on Wednesday. We needed to go out dancing. We needed to go on Saturday.

Thank God for command decisions by Patti. After the afternoon I had on Saturday, I needed to work off my throbbing headache with some dancin', likker and my girlfriends.

We went to a club in north Scottsdale. We bellied up to the bar and began to survey all that surrounded us. Not bad. Some nice eye candy, some not so nice eye candy. Maybe even a prospect or two. But whatever, we weren't here for that...we needed to get down with our badselves...STAT!

Apparently, 10:30 is the bewitching hour in north Scottsdale. We were having a great time at the bar drinking and talking when all of a sudden we were surrounded by varying degrees of skank.

Let me paint you a picture...

1 - Black and gray sweater dress that was two sizes too small, and two feet too short. This look was brought together by the grill on her teefs.

2 - Red clingy dress. Super-plunge neckline. With a leopard print bra that was not made for clingy-super-plunge dresses. The leopard print was peeking out all over the place. She looked like Wild Kingdom.

3 - 8 months pregnant. 'Nuff said.

4 - Blond hair with blue hightlights. Lord Jesus...

5 - WTF? Is that a man? In a tube top and choker? (At this point I ordered a shot of tequila)

After a couple of hours (and several drinks) later, we decided the DJ was playing a good amount of booty shakin' music...so we headed to the dance floor to show 'em all how it's done.

They were line dancing. To hip-hop. WHAT THE HELL!?

We worked our way to the center of the dance floor and began to get our groove on. At one point a nice young man (whose mama is so proud of him, I'm sure...) leaned in to ask if Patti and I were lesbians. I'm not really sure why. We weren't dressed like ho-fessionals. And we weren't dancing like ho-fessionals. Maybe he's never seen some in the wild and was just curious so he asked the first set of girls he saw. I prolly should have sent him over to Wild Kingdom. huh. Anyway...always one to come back with a witty retort, I replied, " No, why are you?" I winked and shook it like Shakira to the other end of the dance floor.

If you're ever in Scottsdale, stop by Jilly's on a Saturday night. It's a good time.