Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Slow day...let's see what's on Yahoo! News....Uh-Oh!

25-lb turkey flies through man's window
Mon Dec 10, 5:51 PM ET

The noise that Chuck Ritter heard while sitting in his living room was a turkey that crashed through a third-story bedroom window (wait…isn’t the turkey a flightless bird? How the sam hill?...). Ritter, 83 (that old man is lucky he didn’t have a damn heart attack!), was relaxing Saturday when the uninvited guest arrived (I hate it when that happens. Especially when I’m out of Chex mix and beer).

Ritter called Joe Battaglia, the on-call maintenance worker at his Traverse City apartment, and they tried to corral the 25-pound bird as it flapped around on the carpet amid blood and shards of glass. (I can just hear the "Mission Impossible" music now. Gee, do you think he’ll get his deposit back?)

After about 30 minutes of trying to ease the turkey toward the window with a broomstick and a fishing pole (wait..let me get a mental picture of this…), Ritter cornered the bird, grabbed it by the neck and threw it out the window (did he scream like a girl, too?)

Ritter said after the ordeal that the turkey would make a nice dinner (especially from the crunch of the extra glass and asphalt embedded in the meat!), and he was looking for a needy family to give it to. (I’m sure they’ll appreciate the cut up, bloody, flattened carcass).

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